Howdy ya'll. I wasn't going to blog today because I ended up working longer than expected and then I was at a co-worker's house trying to fix her daughter's computer. I'm tired. And I'm heartbroken tonight.
Sadly, I get this a lot. There's someone out there that I care about and have feelings for, and we're not together. Actually we're not even friends anymore, sorta. I'm not going to get into this looooong drama, because besides being long, it's all confusing. At this point I don't even know who's to blame, though it's probably both our faults. But I decided I needed to get him out of my life because he wasn't healthy for me, emotionally. It's been 2 months since my decision, and it's hard. It's even harder now that last week he left me a message on my phone that he needed to see me. It sounded urgent so I let him come over. Big mistake! He stopped by to see how I was doing and to give me a gift.
As if it wasn't hard enough to be away from him. Every song I hear, I think of him, and every night I break down and cry because my bed feels so empty without him in it. I miss talking to him before bed, or calling him at 2 a.m. because I had a nightmare and him driving to my house. I miss playing video games with him, or just hanging out. I miss us laughing together, I miss his laugh. I miss the way he looks at me and the way he says my name. I just miss him.
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