Thinking and Dreaming and Thinking Some More

(Wrote this days ago while I was at work but never typed it up. Oops...)

My lovely dear friend, Lisa, read my last post and assigned me some homework: She told me to dream - to envision the life I wanted for myself instead of what I wanted to "do" for a living. So that's what I did. I thought about what I wanted out of life, unfortunately, since I don't play the lottery that often (and even if I did the chances of winning are microscopic) I can't become a lady of leisure. LOL

That being said, I want to have the freedom to go places whenever I want. I want to go to conventions a few times a year. Wake up and go to sleep whenever I want. Have the days off I want, and work as much or as little as I want.

Yeah, that sounds impossible - especially if I'm trying to keep a roof over my head, which I totally want. But maybe some of it can be done. If I worked for myself I might be able to at least set my own hours.

Speaking of, I saw Cynthia last weekend and I started folding origami pieces for my first 3d origami project. It's a lot of paper, and I'm slow, but with time I'm hoping to pick up speed. We'll see how it goes...

Finding Myself (again)

It seems as if every time I'm in search of answers, I find myself back here. It's been 3 years since my last post and I would love to say things have been great up until now, but the truth is my life is the same roller coaster ride that it has been since I first started this blog.

I find myself in yet another identity crisis. I swear, this happens like every other year. Usually I can either solve it fairly quickly, or I can shove it into the recesses of my mind for another year or two. This one is too big and loud for me to ignore though.

I'm feeling trapped in my life again. Especially at work. It's weird, because I don't necessarily hate my job. I get a lot of time off - perks of working at a college - but I don't want to work anymore. I want to work for myself. I want to set my own hours and be my own boss.

Problem is, I don't have any skills that translates into full-time, work from home opportunities. A couple of people brought up my writing, but I'm hella rusty. Not to mention even when I wasn't rusty, my self-loathing prevented me from going all the way through with self publishing. And from what I've seen, the publishing/self-publishing world is going bananas, so who knows how that works anymore.

My best friend Cynthia is super crafty and she does these awesome 3D origami things. She's done Sailor Moon and Tuxedo Mask for my birthday(s) and they are amazing! I've been telling her she should sell them, but she puts it off. Maybe if she can teach me to do them, we could do this together. I know she's also struggling with trying to find what she wants to do. She's currently working at a call center and she's sick of it. I think it would be fun for the both of us to try and do this. So this is something we're going to talk about this weekend. We'll see what happens...

In the meantime, I've decided to dust off this blog and use it to get my writing muscles back on track. SOMETHING in my life has to change, and I'm the only one that can change it, so let's start with this. :)