Dreams of Friendship?

I've been having bizarre dreams these last two days. They're making me think about certain people.

The first one was with Alyssa. She was mostly Alyssa, but part of her was also my cousin. Her and my aunt go into some argument and Alyssa decided she didn't want to associate herself with my aunt anymore. We ended up in her bedroom and her walls were covered with pictures. Alyssa started to take down all of the pictures she had of my aunt and handed them over to me saying that I should give them to my aunt because she wanted nothing to do with her. Then she pulled out the only 3 pictures she had of me because my aunt was in them as well. I told her that those were the only pics she had of me and she said she didn't care.

It really hurt my feelings. I wanted to cry. I think I might have.

Obviously this was a dream, because in real life I wouldn't really be upset about it, I would have just commented that I would give her new pics of me.

This isn't the first time I've had dreams of Aly where she hurts my feelings...I guess it's leftover pain from everything that went down between us. We are in a much better place today, but it seems like a part of my heart still hurts. I hope it isn't something that lasts forever.

Anyway, the dream I had today affected me much more than the Aly dream. It was actually a two parter, sort of. The first "part" was about my childhood best friend, Stephanie. I don't remember much of the details, except that I was seeing her for the first time in years, and we were catching up and everything was great. It was as if no time had passed, and actually in my dream I felt we were even closer than ever. Her mom showed up (though in my dream it didn't physically look like her mom) and we were all talking. I woke up then probably because my room was hot and I had to use the bathroom. HAHA. But when I fell asleep again, I went into part two. I don't know what happened, exactly, it wasn't mentioned, but Stephanie was dead. I remember feeling so devastated. Lost. And I went back to her childhood home where her mom still lived (only the dream. In RL they no longer live there), and of course the house didn't look like anything it does in real life...but I went there and went to the back yard and underneath some leaves and an old rug I found some old middle school IDs for both me and Stephanie. Finding those IDs somehow broke my heart even more than before.

There was a bit more to the dream before I woke up, but that feeling I felt of losing Stephanie was what I took with me when I woke up, and I didn't like at all. This is also not the first dream I've had with Steph, although this is the first one where she has died. I didn't like it. At all.

I don't know what's going on in my subconscious, but there's something going on with really close friendships...Stephanie was my childhood best friend, Alyssa was my high school best friend. Maybe I'm just missing them individually? Maybe I'm missing my current best friends since we're in different states...I dunno.