I've hit a wall, not on my diet though. LOL. I've done ok there. I've lost 8 lbs, which is pretty surprising. Sorry I haven't updated, my schedule was all turned around and I couldn't find the time.
My Barco training is done, today was my first day at my desk w/ the new account. IT WAS HORRIBLE!!! It started out fine, customer wanted to place an order, then I find out she was going to pay w/ a credit card and I crashed and burned. I couldn't process the damn thing! I kept putting her on hold and everyone was busy on the phones. Finally she said she was gonna call back and place the order after work because she had been on hold for too long. :( Epic fail.
I was so freaking distraught, I was on the verge of tears. I knew I wasn't ready to get on the phone by myself, I kept telling my trainer, and they thought I was overreacting. But you know, I've been working at TJG for almost a year and I've been trained on 6 different accounts. I know when I'm just scared, or when I feel uneasy about the program because I don't have enough practice. This is different. Somewhere around the 2nd or 3rd day of training I hit a freaking wall and I did not learn anything. I'm so frustrated with myself, because it's been like this all week. I had a bad voice class this week too. I felt like I let my voice teacher down. Instead of improving, I did worse this week than when I first started coming to her. The worst part is, I was trying. I really was. She kept telling me to put my entire body into it like I usually do, and I thought I was.
I just feel like a failure in everything I've done this week.
My Barco account lead got the supervisor to move me for the next two days. I'm sitting in the back with them so when I get a call, if I need help, they're right there. That's good, I guess...
I feel like a failure though. I feel really dumb. I'm used to being able to do things once I've had some practice, and I had 7 days worth of training. I should be able to do this! But I'm overwhelmed.
I need something to go right next week. I hate feeling so discouraged with every aspect of my life, which is how I'm feeling.
This, That, and Whatever.
2 comments:
If you must see a wall, see a great big door with a big brass doorknob. Grab that knob, twist it hard and swing that door open with all you've got.
Sounds to me like your head is getting in the way in everything you're doing. Find your joy, feel it and everything will flow as it should.
I'm trying, baby.
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